In Celebration of Women Over 40: Because We Exist and We’re Amazing
Despite living in a weird space of transition where you’re no longer considered young, but not really old.
The 40s are a weird space of transition for women where you’re no longer considered young, but not really old. There isn’t any set “thing” to be doing since we all started jobs and families and lives at different stages.
And, despite what the internet thinks, we actually don’t disappear.
But do you know how hard it is to find inspiring stories about women age 40–60 on the internet that aren’t related to business or politics?
Go ahead, do a few searches; I’ll wait.
Here are what you found: a few stories about high-achieving athletes, academics, and businesswomen primarily in their 20s and 30s.
But women in our 40s are Awesome.
We have the experience, confidence, and serious life skills. We’re at the peak of our game. We can still do anything we want — ANYTHING. But we’re also finally wise enough to know what really matters.
So why doesn’t the internet reflect that?
Where ARE the women over 40?
You’re determined, so you keep looking and probably find something like this, “40 Women Over 40 Who Will Make You Hype About Growing TF Up,” because in the rare event the internet acknowledges women over 40 at all, it’s usually to talk about how “good” she looks.
Also, she must be a celebrity.
I just wanted to find inspiration among women my own age who were doing unusual and interesting things, but the internet, strangely, wasn’t showing me much despite my pointed searches.
Mostly business and government announcements are citing a promotion or accolade. Often these are woefully long overdue like this one, “Navy helicopter pilot has been chosen to be the first woman to command a US aircraft carrier,” … after 26 years of service.
Or this one, “Nine Women among Artemis Team of Astronauts Eligible for Early Moon Missions,” … 50+ years after the first man.
These are awesome, but women over 40 are inspirational for more than work, right?
Yes, on the internet, they’re also recognized for philanthropy.
“Local Woman Donates More Than 100 Blankets to …” is an exceedingly popular headline. So too, stories about women hitting major age milestones of 100+.
There are, unfortunately, to nobody’s surprise, a disturbing amount of stories of women’s abuse and women's abusers.
What you won’t find is almost anything else.
The 40s are a weird space of transition for women where you’re no longer considered young, but not really old. There isn’t any set “thing” to be doing since we all started jobs and families and lives at different stages.
Some women in their 40s still have young kids at home while others are closer to being grandparents, or happily never had any children, or maybe are still hoping. We’re lifelong singles, married for the first time, or third, homemakers or careers women … there’s a lot of variety.
The thing that brings people in their 20s together, for example, is that they’re all essentially in the same “life stage,” but as we move into our 30s, the gap in our experiences widens, and by the time we’re in our 40s, we no longer have a recognizable group.
What Do Women in their 40s Do?
I’ve become a sort of amateur adventurist in my 40s, and I wanted to read about other women doing similar things. My friend told me, “Nobody our age is doing stuff like that.”
“Oh, come on,” I rebutted, “Of course they are; we just don’t know them.”
I started searching only to find either she’s right or women over 40 — unless they’re in government, traditional business, or philanthropy — are grossly underrepresented in the stories being told in society today, and probably ever.
You can count on one hand the stories of women over 40 who’ve been recognized for doing notable things — Betsy Ross, Rosa Parks, Marie Curie … I wanted to find more modern stories of women like that.
United States Census data from 2019 indicates the median age is 38.5, and just over half are women, so where are they all hiding? I’m not alone in this thought; it’s noticed worldwide.
Pictures of Women in their 40s
A post published by a United Kingdom organization for professional working mothers called the “Talented Ladies Club” titled “This is What Women Over 40 Look Like” acknowledged the same problem.
They wrote, “We publish at least one article a day on our site. And as our articles are all about or aimed at women, we need to source a LOT of images.
“Sadly, on free stock image sites, women over the age of 40 are barely represented. If you want a laugh, try searching ‘woman 40s’. Most of the girls that appear in the search results could be the daughters of women in their 40s.”
Then I found another promising article, this time from Canada.
Headline: “This is an epic adventure, 11 women canoeing for 40 days in the wilds of Canada.”
Subhead: This trip through remotest Quebec has only been open to teenage girls for 20 years. Our slightly older writer joins one group.
Jackpot! I thought. But as I read, what is a very cool story, the “older writer” turned out to be in her 30s.
I kept searching, and I found articles like these:
· 10 Best Ways to Lose Weight Over 40
· How to Dress After 40 and Still Look Hip
· 20 Things Everyone Should Master by Age 40
· 10 Things To Let Go Of In Your 40’s
· 39 Awesome Things to Do in Your 40s
Do we really not have anything more to say to or about women over the age of 40? Also, who is writing these stories? Probably not women who’ve ever been in their 40s, which would lend to different articles.
Without hours searching, I just want to find a few places telling cool stories about women in their 40s without trying to sell me expensive trips or perform plastic surgery on my face.
Is that so much to ask?
What’s more, dare I say it, I still have dreams for my future. Believe it or not, despite the void on the internet, I’m not dead yet. Based on the 20+ articles about women living to be 100 that I just read, it’s not unrealistic to expect I’ll have another 40 years on this planet.
But what can I do about it? I just one more woman screaming into the void.
I’ve kept searching, though, bookmarking and saving and sharing what I’m finding on social channels and my blog. Slowly and with great effort, I am starting to find something close to the stories I’m looking for. I’ve found headlines like this:
Michelle Obama Named Most Admired Woman Third Year in a Row
‘Badasses in Their Own Right’: Meet the Freshwomen of Congress
They still technically fall under business and government, but they diverge just slightly left of the norm, giving me hope and inspiring. I get a little burst of pride with each of them.
We only make progress by inches.
Gandhi said, “Be the change that you wish to see in the world.”
If I can’t change the world, I can change myself. I’m going to keep at it until I carve a little niche for us.
I know there is a secret underground of women over 40 who are doing cool, inspiring things outside of the norm and have stories worth sharing, I’m hoping I’ll find them in my searches, or they’ll find me. Together, we’ll raise each other’s voices higher and build the community we need.
You can also follow me on www.middlejourney.com
